~Rascal Flats - What Hurts The Most ~

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don't bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out

I'm not afraid to cry
Every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days
Every now and again
I pretend I'm ok but that's not what gets me

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
Not seeing that love in you
Is what I was trying to do

It's hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I'm doing it
It's hard to force that smile when I see your old friends and I'm alone

Still harder
Getting up, getting dressed
Dealing with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade
Give away
All the words that I say
Through my heart that I left unspoken

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
Not seeing that love in you
Is what I was trying to do

Is what I was trying to do
Oh wow oh wow

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
Not seeing that love in you
Is what I was trying to do

Is what I was trying to do
Yeah...
And never knowing
What could have been
Not seeing that love in you
Is what I was trying to do

What hurts the most

I'm having this feeling again, today at work. maybe it's trying to tell me something. telling me to do something about it. after all its been almost a yr since the incident. its hard for me to admit. is hard for me to say it out loud. but its been in me for so long. maybe this will work out. maybe this is what i need. maybe this is what I've been missing in my life. i need the special girl in my life. like i used too. i feel incomplete without the other half. yes, u might think its weird coz usually people say these things abt their romantic partners. but not for me. i need my 8yr old bestfriend back. now. it took me a yr to realize it..gosh..yes..i need her now. it wld be our 10yrs of frenship nex yr..

ive said so many bad things abt her. and yes, she hurt me alot. but we were growing up. we explore new things. n now i know she is the only one who see the best in me. when we were in good terms, she make me feel special. make me feel important. make me feel im cared for. which i have not been feeling all these for so long. the thing is, how am i gonna tell her this?

my girls have been great. but our bond its not that strong. we only had alot of fun times together...i tried being there for them, but its differentlah.. n the other girl in my life been missing in action. i dunno if she is sincere in our friendship. i gave her all out. but i dun feel i get what i give her in return. i feel sad. i noe ive help her alot. i nvr want anything in return, just some appreciation maybe. maybe in just clapping one hand in one side. maybe she already get what she wanted, n dun need me anymore. n this is what i get now...sigh..

im lost. thinking if i am even special to anyone. no. im lonely. hah?!..the happy smiley chirpy mira is lonely. yes i am. inside. for the longest time i could imagine.

sometimes i daydream,i need someone to be my bridesmaid.i cant think of anyone else. except for her. she deserve to be my bridesmaid. but will this work?

im not sure if she is willing to be friends with me after what ive said to her..i told her i dun need her. i have lots of frens. but a matter of fact i dun. i dun have alot of frens..they are there to laugh with me but not cry with me.. yes, some part of her i dun quite like. but thats her. n some part of me she hate. but thats me..

im just confused. do i really need this? but its bugging me for so long. i got jealous when i heard pple say "BFF" (bestfriendsforever), "stayed over at my bestfriends place", "talked on the phone for hrs", "cried over problems"...blah blah blah...i dun have any of these. not anymore. i sorry, im just hard to please..

i hope i will have to courage to do this. afterall, ive been the stubborn one. or i wld nvr do it at all. all i need is time. oh well...the world is full of problems..i feel u my girls..

to siti raudha, i miss u terribly.

it was ms dian engagement with mr chut yesterday. she looked pretty and sweet and nice and all grown up with all the make up & her purple laced baju kurung.. =)

happy engagement cikgu dian & mr chut. =) im sure he will always make u happy..


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the other day i drank "WHATEVER..?"
it taste horrible. like chinese medicine. like grren tea mix with jasmine tea mix with minyak atar..eewwww...i cant stand it after one sip. my sister laughed at me...thanks sis!!

yucks......!!! serve me right for being soo adventurous.. haha

lynna suddenly asked yesterday, "eh wanna go clubbing tonite??". we were like.."huh?!"

wat a sudden. out of nowhere. she must be having fever. heheehee...n we did. plus i hv the excuse of celebrating my mini victory. haha.

yes...we went Dbl O..

i looked fresh rite? coz i was on half day n got to take a shower 1st..
but not them..haha

at last i get to meet daniel..pheobe's roomate, who happens to be German..
hehe..cuteness!!

Nana, having her 1st tuqueila shot.. =P

yup..we still had fun, although we didnt really liked the overdose of House music...especially electric house..argghh..!! coz we didnt know that Obar was the place where the Rnb songs were...how sad..this is wat u get when u are not a frequent clubber..haha.. =P im ok with House music, but nvr in my life that ive dance to it the entire nite.... it gets boring aftr sometime coz the tune are all the same...

but daniel was funny...hilarious..comical abit..super friendly.. phoebe,sal,nana,daniel & myself shared this particular inside joke..abt me being a very naughty girl.. hahah... it was damn funny. we end the nite on a high note.

n this morning we suffer. all four of us were shagged. not enough sleep!!!

p/s: thanks to my baby for sending me there...i love u..

ive made it!..just once..yes once..!! i pass on the trial (90%) and on the real one.. the word PASSED was so huge infront of my face...YEAH!!....n now i have to work hard on the final one.. in august..for now, lets celebrate!! wheeeeeeee!! =)

i miss my baby.. i thought it wld be a great time for me to have my own space and just chill with myself today, BUT i still need him.. i miss him la..although its barely 24hrs since he left..hehe.. its saturday after all.. our "Dating Day".. come home honey...
QUICK!!!

im here without you baby...

waiting for the tok kahdi...smiling all the way...

the bride looking pretty and anxious...she is mrs telor..

u got to love this picture.. picture perfect!!...

why so shy?...got licence already..

of coz..im carrying the most expensive gift...mrs telor COACH bag.. =P

cutting the cake..

happy couple..

bride & groom

the dress that i love..its sooo nice...!!!

hey. my pc still down. but i cant help blogging during office hours.

last week was crazy. alot of things happen. the things that i dun want to happen again. one after another. someone didnt come home the whole night. someone kena lock up in the cell for a nite. someone had a fight with her sister. someone had a misunderstanding with her bestfren. and me? had a big headache and fever so suddenly. coz all this happen in one day. i tried to be strong.can u imagine that?

but everything is fine now. everyone is okay and fine. thank God.

last weekend was over. i rewang 3days & 2nights. my angah big got married. he was damn happy. he was smiling from ear to ear throughout his wedding. i am happy for him. mrs telor was pretty and gorgeous on that day too. i love her balck/purple dress. hav a wonderful honeymoon. mr & mrs telor =) will update the pictures soon.

my computer kena bomb. while using it on saturday, its suddenly switch off by itself with a loud "bomb" sound..ill be away for now..

lastnite i attended eye-makeup workshop at Standford House. again by UOB. but i didnt quite like the workshop, coz the teach really basic eye makeup that ive already know. the plus point is only that they teach how to take care of our eyes properly and how to use fake lashes....n thats abt it..but i really love the sparkling eyeshadow they use...hehe

can u see my fakelashes? as u can see, i still dunno how to use eyeshadow..haha

have u read the news about the girl who died due to overwork?? its in the new paper last few days...she was a staff of HP and she died just a few days after her last entry in her blog...scary...

everyday i took the stairs up to my home. and today was no difference. but the only problem is that i climb the stairs to level4..intead of level3. no wonder i see unfamiliar environment...weird.. i wonder why? so much to think. so many things in my mind. i cant concentrate. even on simple things like going home..Sigh.....